Maria Maria by Carlos Santana
Updated: Jul 4, 2019
I had my idea and it was flowing. I couldn't believe I was really doing this. I told no one until it became too obvious to hide from my husband. Even on the weekends I felt compelled to allow this vision to pour out of me.
Right when I thought I knew where it was going, a story within a story emerged as I listened to the song "Maria Maria" by Santana while writing an intimate moment between two characters. Maria was born.
I continued to write, but couldn't get this minor character out of my head. She was only meant to show the humanity still left in another character, a bit of backstory. The more I left it the more her personality formed in my mind. She was a bad ass waiting to kick open the door of my imagination and escape. My original idea would now be a series.
I'd viciously peddle on a spin bike with dialogue darting between my ears. I could see her face, hear her voice, the world was no longer flat, but round with lots of strange things lurking in dark corners. When it was time to pick up my son from the gym creche, I'd write on my iphone as he romped in the soft play. Maria and her story flew out of me in two months. I tried to write the second book at the same time, but too many competing ideas would not allow the focus I needed. I took a few days to dump all of my vision for all books onto my computer. I felt good about myself again.
Then the thing we wanted happened. A pale blue cross appeared. Sadly, it disappeared just as quickly. The hurt passed. It had to. I still had my ideas, but I was nearly 38. How long would it take to conceive again if ever. What were the next steps? I could live with only two children, but my husband really really wanted another child. Would we have to endure IVF? Or more accurately, would I have to endure. Some couples don't survive the brutality of IVF. More feelings of being stuck. I'd think about that later, for now I returned to my writing.
The following month another blue cross came into our lives and stayed. There would be two babies. One inside my belly and one on my laptop.